By Terry Keefe
A few years back when money was particularly tight and dignity was in short supply, my writing partner and I went in to interview for the coveted positions of head writers of a particularly sleazy, and wildly successful, network reality show which revolved around a group of couples…doing something particularly tawdry at a particularly exotic location. The title of the show and the exact premise aren't relevant at this point, but this particular exchange with the series creator is, to this article at least:
Me: “Well, here’s one idea we had for a competition between the couples, but I’m not sure of the moral implications of it -”
Series Creator: “Morals? [laughs hysterically]” He did everything but twitter his fingers and go, “Mwahahaha.”
We didn’t get that job. Just as well, obviously. This was still back when people responded to my telling of this story with, “Reality shows have writers?” Yes, Virginia, sometimes even a whole staff of them. Fairly well-paid also, or I wouldn’t have even been in the room. But God help those who decide to actually appear on reality television, if they’re dealing with unscrupulous producers like the one referenced above. You sign your life away with a release form and they can edit you any way they please. Hero, villain, or Omarosa. A few years ago, actress Cynthia Silver became an unwitting cog in the reality show machine, although you can hardly blame her for not going into what became the series “Bridezillas” with her eyes wide open. As she was heading towards her wedding with her fiancé Matthew, she made what seemed to be the fairly innocuous decision to participate in a documentary about soon-to-married couples, produced by a British production company with the Merchant-Ivory-esque name of September Films. Silver expected that the footage would be a nice memento of their wedding preparations which they could show to their grandchildren.
Some time after the shooting wrapped, Silver got the news that the show had been sold to Fox. (Right after “You have cancer,” the phrase “Your footage has been sold to Fox” is one of those things no one should have to hear. )
“Bridezillas” was soon born and became a huge hit on both Fox and WE. Silver’s segment was entitled “Life’s a Bitch, and then You Marry One.” All of her worst moments during the stressful wedding preparation process were highlighted. She found herself pilloried on internet message boards and then tried to defend herself on said forums, only to get slammed worse. If you’ve ever tried to argue with anyone on a message board, you will sympathize in particular with this part of her tale. Regular posters on reality television-themed message boards wouldn’t be throwing down their trailer park bon mots all day long if they were normal.
There wasn’t much Silver could do legally about the tarnishing of her public image, so she made lemonade out of this rotting box of wedding cake the best way she knew how: by putting on a one-woman show about it, which was entitled “Bridezilla Strikes Back.” And revenge has been sweet indeed. The show was one of the breakout hits of the prestigious New York International Fringe Festival in 2005, winning the award for Outstanding Solo Show and landed for Silver a number of glowing profiles and reviews in the top Manhattan magazines and newspapers. The performance we saw was during her recent Los Angeles run at the Zephyr Theater on Melrose. Co-written with Kenny Finkle and directed by Lee Sankowich, “Bridezilla Strikes Back” is sharply scripted and quite funny. Silver is charming, particularly during the bits where she self-deprecatingly imagines herself being the best friend of Jennifer Aniston, and interviewed by Oprah, which is not actually inconceivable if the daytime queen herself sees this show. The reality show nightmare provides a strong spine for the material, which is offset nicely by the sweetness provided by the ongoing love story of Silver and her husband-to-be, who is an off-stage supporting character in the narrative. Something worth mentioning to the industry types that read this site: there is an obvious feature-length narrative film that one could see coming out of this material, as a romance set against the backdrop of a known reality television show. It worked for Slumdog.
One of these days we’re all going to wake up in a version of The Truman Show and find that every moment of our lives is being taped for the daily entertainment of others, watching anonymously somewhere on a hi-def television, computer screen, or iPhone. We may be there now. Privacy is seemingly dead and no one cares. Intellectual property copyright…likewise. And when we all do wake up with a laugh track going in the background constantly, we can also thank reality television for firing the first shots which helped break down those walls of decorum and dignity which were part of society’s fabric since civilization seemingly decided that throwing slaves to the lions in the coliseum was bad for everyone involved. Trust me, we’re all just a few innocent missteps away from appearing on our own version of “Bridezillas.” See that pimply kid on the sidewalk who looks like he’s just playing with his camera but sort of focusing it in your direction? Watch out for that little bastard. It might be going a bit far to say that Cynthia Silver is our Spartacus in this particular fight, but the sight of legions of exploited reality television participants standing up and saying, “I’m Bridezilla!” is an unscripted show I’d make time to watch.
Check out Cynthia Silver’s MySpace page for “Bridezilla Strikes Back” at
http://www.myspace.com/bridezillastrikesback
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